Sean was born on April 30, 1988 in Salt Lake City, Utah and left way too early. He was the youngest of three children, he was my baby. He went to Churchill Jr. High where he met his lifelong friends and roommates. Half of which died before him. Sean’s life was not easy. But he found his way and was very proud of it and himself. To his friends he was Sean Bear.
He found one of his purposes in his work as a Stage and Lighting technician (Pirate). Which he did up until the day before he died. And again he found a world of lifelong friends which included all of his childhood friends as well. Pirates forever! He took great pride in all he did and it showed.
Sean struggled with alcohol and depression in his younger years but found sobriety in the last three years of his life. Where his outlook changed. He found Nature. Sean never did anything halfway. If he was interested in something he went after it and learned all he could.
Interests: Lighting and Stage production. He was a writer, a nature photographer, a fisherman, an emergency prepper, a hiker, a prolific reader, etc., etc.
Sean was caring, thoughtful, loyal and loving. He respected and earned respect. The world is a different place both because he was here and now because he is gone. He died February 3, 2017. Way too soon….
I could on forever, instead find this letter (below) written by my Sean Bear.
Love you babe,
Mama Bear
To my dearest Friends and my Beloved Family,
I am writing you this letter today with my thoughts set on the future. What a strange and beautiful place the future is.… Full of so much hope and wonder, where we can be anyone, and do anything we put our minds to, because anything is possible and the only thing that is certain is uncertainty.
I find my thoughts set on the future quite often these days…. “What adventures will there be? What fish will be caught? Where will my trails lead? And what beauty will I find on the other side of those mountains?” And still, even with my head filled with so many curiosities and wonder and the thrill of heading towards the unknown, I always find my mind wandering back to the single invitability that awaits all our futures. It is a sobering thought, and one that we all have sooner or later. How unfortunate it is to be cursed with the knowledge of our own mortality.… Imagine the things we would do, and the lives we would live if we had no knowledge (or fear) of death.
It is for this reason that I so greatly admire Nature. There is no time to worry about death or dying in nature. Th animals do not care how delicate and fragile their existence is. They are not burdened with the fear of tomorrow. They do not worry about their future, and they have no regrets about their past. They are truly free. They truly live each and every moment to the fullest, and when they die, the other animals do not mourn, the trees do not cry, the rocks remain apathetic, and the flowers do not shed their petals. There is no time for the world to stop and ponder. That would be a waste of energy, and nature does not waste energy.
No…. As a matter of fact, nature immediately goes to work re-purposing that energy. Everything is broken down and redistributed. Some goes to the Plants and Animals, some rises up into the Air, some breaks down into the Water, and the rest is absorbed by the Earth. Everything is reused, and nothing is wasted. That life is not wasted. It goes on. The energy from that life goes on to creating new energy for new life. Nothing is lost, nothing is wasted, it is simply redistributed.
This is not something to be sad over. This is something beautiful. Life is beautiful, but life is only possible because of Death and vice versa, so in turn, Death must be beautiful too.
My dearest friends and family, the people I love more than anything in this world, I am writing you this letter today with the knowledge that it will be read after my time has passed, and I do not want your memory of me to be one of sorrow. Too often people pass, and the only thing anyone knows how to feel is the feeling of loss. Please, do not think of me as lost, for I have not gone anywhere. I am right here, just as I have always been, and will always be. I am still here with you.
I am still here with you, enjoying the warmth of the sun and peaceful calm of the night. I am still here walking the winding trails through the tall trees of the forests. I am still here pulling fish out of our deep blue lakes and crystal streams. I am still here enjoying every sunrise and sunset, and feeling the rain, and playing in the snow. And feeling the wind rip through my hair. I am still here looking up at that big beautiful moon and all of the countless stars surrounding it…. And anytime you look at the world around you and you see something so beautiful that you can’t help but feel your heart swell and your eyes water, I will be there with you too. My eyes glossy and my heart swelling with yours. I will always be here with you. You just have to look in the right places.
The world is everything. We are all connected to it, and it is connected to all of us.
Sean Curtis
